Tacky Isn't the Word, Joanne... More Like Obscene

I can't resist. For weeks now the TV has been showing what I consider obscene previews of two new shows, "Lipstick Jungle" and "Cashmere Mafia."

Just to clarify, I'm using the word obscene as in this definition from the Online Etymology Dictionary: "1593, "offensive to the senses, or to taste and refinement."

I talk women's issues a lot here at Lip-sticking. This blog is meant to discuss the ways you should be marketing to women online and also provide some insight into the way women think. I have to confess today that -- I'm totally clueless about what the women who are appearing in these two new shows were or are thinking. I'm further clueless about why such shows need exist.

To whit - Joanne Ostrow at The Denver Post wrote a review of the two shows (Feb. 6, 08) much in agreement with my view, but...a bit too tame for me. Joanne said, "The assertive-to-the-point-of-aggressive woman is getting special scrutiny this year. Whether they're sparring over a lover, a promotion or a condo, women can be sharks. At least that's the vision of successful cosmopolitan women offered by a certain strain of TV series suddenly in abundance."

She goes on to qualify the new shows, Lipstick Jungle and Cashmere Mafia, as "tacky soap opera."

Well, that's not what I see when I'm subjected to the previews. What I see are groups of women throwing away their power (their very femininity) as women to act like...men. I see women so determined to get into the old boys' club that they'll seduce anything with pants on - anywhere, anytime. These are characters, mind you. I know that. But, why are the actresses so keen on playing characters created to do nothing but demean women? Why are we so "desperate" that we buy into the popular culture of using overt sexuality to prove our self-worth? Is this what we hope our daughters grow up to become?

The shows clearly skirt around the censors. The sex and partial nudity are for titillating purposes only. Isn't sex and nudity always for titillation purposes? To what end? Softcore porn is still softcore porn - whether it's on a cable channel or my mainstream television channel. Do young women (and I firmly believe these shows are aimed at young women) really want this kind of "entertainment" - every Wed or Thurs, or whatever day they'll be aired? Do young women really think these shows are demonstrating the power of a woman to achieve boardroom success?

Someone will likely write in and say they're (the shows) just like real life (deliver me from such reality if that's true). Someone, man or woman, will call me a prude (okay, so I'm sick to death of pretend sex and gratuitious nudity on nightime TV - give me something of substance, please). Someone, somewhere will tell me to lighten up - that it's just television (television intent upon convincing women that yes, it's your body, your good looks, and your willingness to be 'had' by younger men that makes you worthwhile). Hence, my assertion that it's just obscene!

In the end, it isn't the fault of the studios (though they could opt for higher standards). It isn't the writers' fault (though they could actually consider plotlines and intrigue). And it isn't the actresses' faults (most of them are just trying to hang on to whatever small shred of 'sexy' they can as they age -while raising daughters to -- what? not be like they are???).

Ladies and gentlemen...I maintain that it's our fault. Without viewers, shows like these would not be created. Women need to take responsibility for trash like this. Obscenity should not be a given part of our prime time TV viewing. (just for the record, nudity is not the same thing as gratuitious sex and nudity). And yes, I hear some of you saying...change the channel. I will, if I happen to be watching one of the channel's that offer either of these shows. I hope a lot of other women do, too.

As Joanne says in her article, if you're thinking of tuning in to one or both of these shows, join me and, "Resist the urge."

Comments

[Yvonne DiVita]

Hmmm, Leah. How did Everyone Loves Raymond get into this? There were strong women - who did not engage in sex to get work done - long before these two shows. There was Candice Bergen in Murphy Brown (she even had a baby out of wedlock), and Designing Women and ... well, I could go on. THESE were strong women who stood their ground.

I'm curious about whether or not other women in your generation feel as you do. How, exactly, do the women in these shows demonstrate their power to you? I'm willing to learn... teach me.

[Leah]

I'm a young professional and work in consulting...and I don't aspire to be the wife on Everyone Loves Raymond. I want to see strong, successful women on tv. I believe I'll be removing your blog from the sites that I regularly visit. I think your insights apply only to the middle-aged.

[Yvonne DiVita]

Ok, let's get this straight... like escargot and cookies and creme ice cream, I don't have to partake to know I don't like them. I base my review on the previews - previews taken FROM the shows, right?

The previews were purposely scintillating (did I spell that right?) and repeatedly showed women behaving badly. IMHO.

Also, I respect the opinions of others and so far, Cindy, you're the only one on the plus side. That's okay - you likely see something we don't.

But, I stand by my review - these shows are not meant to reflect reality. They're just entertaining. The question is: who is entertained by them? And why? I say, bring back Murphy Brown.

[feefifoto]

As long as we're urging the boycott of gratuitous sex, let's also insist on tuning out degrading reality shows. If we gawk and laugh at people who are willing to humiliate themselves for no good reason, we humiliate ourselves as well.

[Amanda]

I have seen neither of these shows, although I was tempted. After reading the reviews given here, I see I haven't missed a thing. Why do women in tv & movies need to be so desperate? Desperate for the perfect man, the perfect baby, the perfect job. And it kills me when they give a character real value and quality but then they tear it down with some tragedy. They rarely keep female characters strong & independent. Thank you for such a good discussion.

[Cindy]

I don't understand how everyone could admit to not seeing these shows and still giving such a review. If you did, you may see that most of what you say is rather incorrect.

In Cashmere Mafia, there are no references to any of the women seducing men to get to the top. On the contrary, one of the main characters gets incredibly angry when she sees her intern seducing one of her co-workers. And the incident with one of them getting back at her husband for cheating? In the end, she decided she couldn't do it.

I think that Cashmere Mafia is great because it shows that females CAN make it big in the business world WITHOUT showing seducing men but by their intellect and skills. That's what the show is really about, and if you watched it you may be able to see that.

I can't vouch for Lipstick Jungle because I don't watch it.

[Yvonne DiVita]

Thanks for the great comments on this "touchy" issue. I like Mary's point that erotic scenes don't have to include nudity. Nudity, in and of itself, is not the culprit here. I don't think nudity for shock value is worth it, especially on TV, but I don't have a problem with nudity. I have a problem with women allowing themselves to portray themselves as sex objects, to demean themselves (and the rest of us) by condoning bad behavior and bad decisions, and then - falling back on the excuse that it was the script, or the producer, or whatever.

I don't buy it.

[Mary Schmidt]

I watched about 1 and 1/2 episodes of Cashmere Mafia since I was curious and it was developed by Darren Star who also did Sex and the City (I found S&C mildly entertaining occasionally - if nothing else than to check out the increasingly bizarre outfits they put on Sarah Jessica Parker. However, as one critic noted about that series, it was a gay man writing dialogue for women as if they were gay men.)

I found Cashmere Mafia boring, tedious, and insulting. Please - the women are power players and don't have the b***s to stand up to their nannies or assistants? And - OF COURSE - the "happily married" woman would turn out to be married to a serial cheater. What was really appalling is that her little "mafia" pitched right in to find her a man to sleep with as pay-back (tacky, tacky, tacky - not to mention woefully immature.)

Further - like you I'm no prude. But, c'mon, if I want to see female nudity I can go look in the bathroom mirror. And, sex is best enjoyed as a participant sport, not a spectator sport.

That said, I love a good erotic scene. But the most erotic are often the ones that show the least. (Bull Durham had very limited skin showing. No real action or clothes coming off in Last of The Mohicans. Nothing but dancing in Witness with Harrison Ford and Kelly McGillis. And so on. The brain is the sexiest organ. And - imagination! Ah, that's the best thing of all.

Key here is the failure of the entertainment industry to think in mature, adult terms. And, television is still designed for mass market mediocrity and cheap titilation.

So, I watch a lot of HGTV and rent movies.

[Mary Hunt]

When I looked down the list of movies that were playing at the Sundance Film Festival I was amazed at how many of them I wanted to see.

Thanks for taking a stand on this. There's a reason that film festivals are so popular. We are starving for something with relevance. Thank goodness the writer's strike is over.

[WOW! Womens World]

While I have seen neither preview, and do not intend to at this point as I completely agree with you, I have have always maintained that women can attain their desired end result in business by "being assertive" without having to resort to "getting aggressive."

Julie for WOW!