"No, I'm not pretty. I'm... plain. Plain Jane, that's how I describe myself"
August 26, 2013
by Yvonne DiVita
What would you say if someone asked you to describe yourself? "Tell me what you look like," they say, on a phone call. "I could probably check Google or Facebook, but you tell me," they push on. "What color is your hair? Your eyes? Do you have a round face or a long, thin face? I'm really interested because... I wonder how you see yourself."
What would you say? How do you see YOURSELF? Tall? Thin? Short? Chubby? Tall and chubby, short and thin? Is your hair long and beautiful, or short... and messy? Do you consider yourself a looker? Or, just... plain old me. Would you be able to answer honestly? Do you know what you look like? Is that image in the mirror really you?
I know I have trouble with this. I posted a picture on Facebook today and folks were commenting on how "stunning" I looked. Stunning? I thought. Wow... that wasn't what I saw at all. I hesitated even sharing the picture because I look... old. Yes, I think I look old.
Too many of us see ourselves... as a plain Jane, or worse, as a ... "good enough" person, unremarkable, unmemorable, and certainly not worth mention. When we allow ourselves to think of who we are, imagine ourselves as "she" instead of "me", we think we're not good enough - we lack that glowing complexion of our favorite actress, or colleague under 30. We feel that we're too this or too that (generally fat or thin), and we struggle to get dressed every day because...nothing fits, nothing looks right, it's a chore to put the outfits on... knowing they're not going to improve the plain Janeness of your appearance. And, our day starts out poorly because everyone knows we are all judged by how you look.
Of course, the reality is that we spend too much time thinking negative thoughts about ourselves; we spend too much time comparing ourselves to others - who are smarter, prettier, taller, shorter, with curly hair, without curly hair, with great complexions, with a better smile, straighter teeth... whatever.
I recommend viewing this video... more than once. And, sharing with friends. Because there is a reality here, a truth that every woman should learn and embrace. Starting... with you.
For what it's worth (and I know looks aren't everything), I've met you in person and in my eyes you're far more than plain!
Posted by: Laurie Eno | August 31, 2013 at 10:16 AM
I looked at the photo you were referring to and I see your beautiful long neck, a genuine smile, and a hair color I wish I could recreate for my coif!
In my case, working from home makes putting myself together to go out seem like more of an effort - not sure if that's a good or a bad thing.
I think we all have great days, good days and not-so-good days - and on the latter we hope we have people who tell us we look stunning - and we should smile and believe them, because they see us from the inside out.
Posted by: Veronika Freeman | August 26, 2013 at 04:07 PM